I came out to my dad tonight. Emotionally it was a lot easier, but I think that is because I am not as close to my dad as I am my mom, and the fact that my mom was sitting there when I did it. However I also am not happy with how it went.
It became painfully obvious that my dad believes being gay is a choice. I expected the “how do you know for sure?” question. But some of the other questions made me want to scream.
The question that really irritated me was when he said “I am assuming you have done your research and you know what this means for you.”. When he said it he said it in a way that was “are you sure you want to make this choice and not choose to be straight.”. Like it is as simple as flipping a switch.
I did appreciate that he gave me the option to tell my grandparents and anyone else whenever I want.
I also came out to one of my brothers today. This was the brother who I knew would have no problem with it. I told him, he said wow about a dozen times, and that was it. We have had conversations before about gay rights, and actually just on Monday he talked about how when he has kids he does not want to raise them to be afraid of gay people. I so wanted to say during that conversation that it will be easier than he thinks.
Well have a great Thanksgiving if I do not post between now and then!
November 24th, 2011 at 10:41 am
Hey Chris! Well first off, I’d like to say congratulations! This must have been so hard and so stressful for you! Been there! Anyway, I understand your reaction regarding your dad. That being said, I think you should probably give him some time to get familiar with the whole idea of you being gay. I also think he will eventually figure out that being gay is NOT a choice. Besides, he’ll be happy to see you with a loving boyfriend (soon, I hope!). At the end of the day, I’m pretty sure you feel so relieved (I know I did). I’m proud of you!
You take care,
Pete.