The other day I was having a drink with a few co-workers and was asked for about the 1000th time if I had a girlfriend. I decided I was tired of answering that question and decided to come out.
One thing I think most people are afraid of when they come out to someone is the challenge of explaining why you are gay and getting someone to accept you being gay. We are afraid of getting fired or ostracized.
When I came out to my coworkers I experienced none of this. The conversation went:
Me: Well honestly I will never have a girlfriend.
Co-Workers: Why?
Me: I am gay.
Co-Workers: Do you need a boyfriend?
This made me realize just how far the gay community has come in its acceptance recently. There was no asking why I was gay or how I was gay or wow or we can no longer be friends. It was let me help you find a boyfriend.
I learned not to be afraid of coming out anymore. Yes, you can still have a bad experience coming out, but it is a lot easier to do today.
This conversation almost doubled the number of straight people who know I am gay. However, this conversation has also made me a lot happier and feels like a big weight lifted from my shoulders. I learned to not be afraid of coming out.
Can it still be dangerous? Yes. I could have gotten fired as a result of that conversation. But I learned not to be as afraid and be much more willing to come out.
P.S. I know I said I was done posting, and this does not mean I am starting again. But I will continue to post occasionally about important events that I think need to be shared.
June 14th, 2009 at 8:29 pm
GOOD FOR YOU! You should be very proud of yourself for taking that step!
June 15th, 2009 at 10:24 am
good luck to you.
July 2nd, 2009 at 9:26 pm
Depending on the part of the country you live depends much on the level of acceptance you’ll receive. I think you mispoke about how far the gay community has come in it’s acceptance but it’s the level the hedero community has accepted. I don’t accept homosexuality as you may think and I don’t agree with it, but I do believe in your right to feel however you wish and express those feelings, regardless if I agree or not.
My point is, it’s how far the hedero community has come to it’s acceptence of the gay community, not the gay community. Best wishes for you and the lifestyle you choose.
November 5th, 2009 at 12:04 pm
Just passing thru and thought i would hit you up and let you you know that you have a cool blog.
November 15th, 2009 at 9:02 am
cool! good luck
April 21st, 2010 at 5:24 am
I’m so happy that you were able to come out safely!