My Gay Life

Fears. I have three phobias. I have learned to combat all of them relatively well and if you knew me you would have no idea about them if I did not tell you. I have a fear of water. My mom and I discovered this when she tried to take me for swim lessons I refused. Yes, I can swim and will go swimming, or whitewater rafting, etc. but I avoid them. I have a fear of hamburgers I do not see cooked. I have no idea why, I just know I refuse to eat hamburgers at restaurants because I did not see them cooked. My third fear is of dogs. This is the result of being bit by one when I was riding my bike to school one day.

The Bilerico Project

The Bilerico Project is a political commentary, gay entertainment, and every day gay life blog. When the blog started it focused on LGBTQ issues in Indiana, but the readership expanded nationally and now the project covers mostly national LGBTQ news. However, it still covers the occasional Indiana specific story. This is worthwhile reading for anyone in the US or anyone wanting to know about the LGBTQ situation in the US.

Every gay guy who is in the closet worries about coming out at work. We are all dependent on the job for living money, and even if the company has an anti-discrimination policy that includes sexual preference, it is not something most of us are willing to deal with until we are financially independent.

This has been a stressful issue for me these past couple months as I am trying to come out at the same time as starting a new job. If I was financially dependent or out before I started I don’t think I would have found this as a stressful situation, but I wasn’t out and I did find it stressful.

Well, I found it stressful until last Friday. Last Friday, I learned one of the guys in my office is gay. Knowing that there is another gay guy in my office, and that he is accepted by the few other people in the office makes me feel like I can be open about myself.

On any given day there are only 6-8 people in my office, so you can understand why not being accepted by just a few would make for a frustrating work environment. Yet, I have to ask the question if I have been working for this company for 2.5 months how did I not know he was gay?

The truth is, I did suspect it, but like I try to envision myself he is a straight acting guy that you would never know is gay unless you ask him. I found out solely through a conversation that I honestly do not remember what it was about. The guy has been with his partner for 20 years and has brought him to the company Christmas party so I know the entire office should be aware of it.

Knowing this has made me a lot happier and relieved a burden from me. I really need to stop worrying about these things, but the financial implications made it a requirement. Anyway, I am a lot happier and I think knowing this will help me in coming out and get through this process faster.

Eagle Scout. Yes, I am a gay Eagle Scout, and scouting was a big part of my life. Now that I am out, being involved in scouts is a lot more difficult. Okay, essentially impossible. That doesn’t mean I don’t miss the camping and friendship from scouting.

Trick Wire: Some Gay Sensibilities

I find Trick Wire to be very enjoyable reading that draws you in and keeps you coming back for more. I can’t really give a theme to this blog outside of gay as it is relatively new (only 14 posts). Right now it appears to be Skye’s random thoughts.

Skye describes his blog as

I started the blog on July 1st intending it to be at most a place for me to interact with the local online gay community. I have since asked myself several times what direction I want to go with it. I think I’m only sure of what it’s not. It’s not an aggregator or daily journal or porn portal. I just choose a topic that I think I might currently be in a state of mind to write a few paragraphs about and see what I can do with it. I write down topics as I think of them and then every couple days choose one from the list. I suggest checking back every 3 or 4 days for updates.

I could see my posts being suitable for placement on the inside of a restroom stall door. They give you something to do during and in between other major life activities, but don’t require any additional exertion.

I am not the type of person that goes out to the bars every night of the week, or one night a week, or one night a month. I am content to go out to the bars only once every couple of months, there are plenty of other ways to have fun.

Well the problem with this, is I am finding it hard to meet other guys. Without going out to the bars I am not sure how to meet other guys.

So that leaves me with a question. Outside of the bars, how do you meet guys?